She's an EX For a Reason

So I've been dealing with an ex girlfriend.  My boyfriend still talks to his ex, but it barely happens.  To me it's weird.  She cheated on him when they dated so I don't understand.  He hunts at her house, but when he goes there he only talks to her parents.  I just don't appreciate the fact he still talks to her.  We've been dating for almost a year and a half, so we're to the point where we've earned each others trust.  But I've never met this girl and I have no clue what kind of a person she is.  I have two guys I talk to all the time, they're my best friends.  I've never dated either of them.  And my boyfriend knows who they are and what kind of people they are.  I worry about what this girl may try or anything like that.  I know my boyfriend will deny her if she does try anything, I just worry it's going to happen.  I would never want to meet her though because I know I would have words to exchange with her and that wouldn't go over well.  I don't know what to do.  I guess I will eventually figure it out. 

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Comments (137)

  1. thoughtsofmrsking2b

    You need to meet her by all means…

    August 17, 2013
    1. purpleabyss


      September 16, 2013
    2. mrsstracener

      keep your enemies closer!!!

      November 03, 2013
    3. wheretheelephantsare

      as soon as possible!

      December 17, 2013
    4. This comment has been deleted
    5. heartbreaker13

      She needs to know you don’t play games.

      July 09, 2015
    6. samy_shiny

      meeting is nothing, if u want to marry him, u must stop him and her.

      September 05, 2015
  2. mindmagic

    I agree on the ex for a reason point. Personally I think relationships are over and done, and should stay that way. But I’ve never been friends with an ex. Good luck with this.

    August 18, 2013
    1. GoldFish91

      agreed, there was a reason it didn’t work out, so why even bother with a friendship? No thanks, next please! lol

      August 28, 2013
      1. perrisvance

        would you like to be my best friends

        February 06, 2014
  3. kmulrane

    I think you need to make up your mind first of all. Then take it from there. You need to be comfortable with meeting her or not meeting her…i agree its weird that he still talks to her parents…like creepy much? But i think that you need to talk to him about how uncomfortable you are. If you’ve been going out for as long as you said i think you have a little pull in the relationship to tell him that his cheating ex girlfriend hanging around his brain is disturbing you.

    August 23, 2013
    1. This comment has been deleted
  4. GoldFish91

    If your not ok with it you either need to tell him to stop talking to her (but not in a bitchy way) or put the skids on your relationship before someone/something happens. It makes it even worse that shes an ex and not just a friend.

    August 28, 2013
  5. jenimae123

    Tell him how you feel why do you have to be worried over a girl who didn’t really care about him in the 1st just remember you have him she does not

    August 29, 2013
    1. angel4113

      I agree I mean what they had is done and over with and if he still wanted her something would have happened and you guys wouldn’t be together as long as you are. people can be ex’s and friends. just means they gave it shot and realized that what was between them was purely just friendship and nothing more

      January 24, 2014
  6. ceciliamurray82

    I have a husband, and yeah, I worry about girls too but trust is there which is good in my relationship and like you said its in yours too. But if you have any worries, be comfortable with meeting her before hand. don’t just meet her randomly and not be okay with it. Whenever i talk to my ex, its whatever, nothing personal goes on like what we had in the relationship. but thats me. but be comfortable. If you know he will deny her in any way, dont worry. hes with you for a reason and not her! but good luck! (:

    August 31, 2013
  7. maisy

    Do I really have to read the responses… I’m sure it’s clear to everyone that your boyfriend is not over the ex. Not saying he wants to get back together, or he doesn’t care about you. There is no doubt you care about this guy, and have put the time in for the relationship to work. Now flip the script. He put that same time and effort for “old what’s her name” and we all know how guys hate to lose Anyway, I’m sure you’ve already made up your mind… work it out or walk away, but keep your head up and don’t be blindsided by what ever is coming next.

    September 01, 2013
  8. anniemationflow

    You don’t need to meet her at all.
    He needs to cut contact with her. As you said, she’s an ex for a reason!

    September 03, 2013
  9. kimberly29

    I have been there with someone’s ex.. and I would say meet her and and let her now how you feel. but first talk to you boyfriend and tell him how you feel about it.

    September 11, 2013
  10. sublimechic420

    if you’ve been together for a year and a half and she’s never tried anything why would she now? if they rarely talk and he hunts at her parents house don’t you think he’s probably just nice to her so it doesn’t cause unnecessary drama? i think unless he’s going to hang out with her and not inviting you along there shouldn’t really be a problem there. you talk about trust but do you really? all you girls are being really immature saying she should tell him not to talk to her or leave. I’m friends with almost all of my ex’s. Why? bc just bc we didn’t work as a couple doesn’t mean i don’t think they’re good people. i dated them for a reason right? why the person you’re with is your best friend you can’t just cut them out of your life. you don’t have to like her and you don’t have to like the situation but obviously he has a good relationship with her parents so why would you not want that for him? everyone needs good people in their lives no matter how they got there. my current boyfriend goes with me to hang out with my ex and his new gf. we take his niece and nephew for the weekend and they call us aunt ashley and uncle tyler. his mom is like my mom and his sister is one of my best friends. and we take my bf’s ex’s kid for the weekends and even though we are not friends with her he loves her son and her son loves him. i would never dream of taking that away from them. it’s fine to let him know how you feel about it but don’t make him choose, chances are you won’t like his choice.

    September 12, 2013
    1. angel4113


      January 24, 2014
    2. expressthoughtsfeelings

      definitely agree with this post.
      I would also keep in mind to follow your intuition
      because most of the times it is always right.

      September 28, 2014
    3. samy_shiny

      Totally can’t judge males at all untill have clear proof. like sublimechic420.

      September 05, 2015
    4. suicidalthoughtsdotph

      Yeap yeap yeap… I think this is an issue between you and your boyfriend. It seems that the girl has already moved on since they rarely talk. It seems to me that your boyfriend is the one who has issues letting go. Hey think about it girl, Who’s stalking Who?? Anyway I think It’s unfair of people to be in a relationship or even start one if they are not totally over their EX… As the title of your post says, “she is an ex for a reason”.. Not unless they had kids, I dont think there is anyway or any reason for them to actually be talking.. Please talk to your boy, and set things straight.. He needs to let go dude.. Anyway goodluck, Cheers c’’,)

      October 01, 2015
  11. simply_just_me

    the best thing is to meet the girl and see what she’s up to. Because if you don’t you’re going to keep stressing about this.

    September 18, 2013
  12. Dreamgiver77

    Have you talked to your bf about this…Hopefully you and he can talk this out communication is the key and if you still feel the need to meet her then do that, but let him know how u feel about the situation.

    September 30, 2013
  13. melissaanne

    To me I think if you trust the other person there is no big deal. I am best friends with one of my ex’s, I dated him for two years. My current boyfriend knew this coming into the relationship and he doesn’t think it’s a huge deal. I think if you met her it would be a little better, but the trust thing is the best. It shouldn’t be a huge issue. You said you were best friends with two other guys? It doesn’t matter if you didn’t date either of them, your boyfriend could be having the same thoughts as you are about his ex. To him now that ex is just a girl. You’re his girlfriend, and like someone said earlier, it’s been a year and a half so why would she try something now? I honestly think it’s all good, you’re just over thinking it. If the trust is there, you have nothing to worry about.

    October 08, 2013
  14. brokenlulaby

    sometimes people develop a strong bond with someone not in a relationship way but in friendship way. If it truly bothers you sit down alone with him and share your feelings. If he really does love you then he’ll understand why you are feeling this way. Its bad to hold things like this in. Not just for you but for the relationship as well. good luck hun I hope things get better.

    October 11, 2013
  15. silentbutloud

    I totally understand your situation, I was recently in that situation. It was hard for me as well :/ How did you deal with it?

    October 12, 2013
  16. magiclady

    meet her, get to know her. You understand that your boyfriend would deny her any type of anything and thats good. you trust him, but you need to meet her. You need to insist on meeting her. You have the right to know who he is talking to and you have the right to want to feel okay with what is going on. Explain that to him and let him know this makes you feel uncomfortable. (: best wishes!

    October 19, 2013
  17. vmavaz

    personally I feel like theres not reason why they should be talking what is there to talk about ? past feelings ? past events ? memories ? no I had this problem with my boyfriend where I already know what type of girl this chick is and I hate her because she doesn’t know her place but you shouldn’t have to meet her and he shoukd just stop talking to her or whatever hes doing .

    October 27, 2013
  18. penguinlitter

    i personally believe in this saying “keep your friends close, and your enemies closer”, it’s actually fun being this miss sunshine and acting all friendly and stuff just to show her that you are way too nice to be hurt. girl wars should be sneaky. and who knows, she might even turn out to be the best sister you never had.

    November 06, 2013
  19. kaitlyn_feels

    I think you should meet her. Considering how close the two seem. It is also your business. You need to show her you don’t play games. that you are the new girl. so she better be careful.

    November 08, 2013
  20. itzuhbell2u

    Communication is the key. That’s how you feel, and if he loves you he should understand and communicate with you regardless. Keep your head up dear, and don’t get yourself worked up not healthy.
    take care

    November 14, 2013
  21. fuzzlor

    I wouldnt worry about it unless something actually happens, then you will know for sure he cannot be trusted. Until then you are just risking bringing unnecessary drama into a relationship you are both happy with. You say you trust him, so trust him and trust he wouldnt do anything to hurt you. It does sound like he only talks to her because he has to, and to keep his relationship with her parents on a friendly level. If you find you cant stop stressing, maybe just talk to him and ask that he stops hunting there if she starts getting overly friendly with him, and go back to trusting he will do the right thing.

    November 15, 2013
  22. one-more-thing

    I say if you are worried about her the least bit, it’s because you don’t know her. Don’t let your insecurities get the best of you. I think it would be a great idea to meet her and get a feel for who she is. The reason he talks to her parents is probably because he built a relationship with them and it has absolutely nothing to do with her. Good luck and hang in there!

    November 17, 2013
  23. cherlittler

    One rule ive always have had with everyone I was in a serious relationship with, number one rule anyone we’ve had a past with we dont talk to. Its just easier thar way, plus if they really need YOU in there life they will be willing to give up there ex’s EVEN IF ITS A ONE NIGHT STAND.

    November 29, 2013
  24. model3679

    Just talk to him hell I would go to the girls house with just saying if he was bf I would go with him to see that if I can trust you but no onw will know if you dont do anything. If this makes sence…

    December 15, 2013
  25. dashakadoshnikov

    you should trust your man to the fullest. Don’t meet the girl – it will agitate you more . little things about her will bug you.

    January 04, 2014
  26. killingtime

    Some people are able to continue “friendships” with ex’s & well……just about anyone. I’m not one of them & really don’t understand being able to do that but some can. I don’t understand it but more power to them if they can. I wouldn’t get to upset of about it but that’s just me.

    January 12, 2014
  27. lindseyrai

    tell him that you dont like it and think its wierd and if he does not stop talking to her if thats what you want tell himto pick you or her

    January 16, 2014
  28. sageisawesome

    Did you ever tell you boyfriend about your feelings towards this? It would be smart thing to do. But some guys do react bad to being questioned. But I agree with the other girls as well. Meet the btch. You never know if she has something better than you till you go.

    January 16, 2014
  29. criplemike

    I understand how you feel, and It can be overwhelming from time to time. It’s normal feeling the way you do, don’t worry about that. Just understand that an EX is more than just a title or label, even if she did hurt him; they shared there lives in the past and there were feelings. Those feelings of live isn’t there anymore, but caring about a person is normal. Just as how you would care about your two male friends, he might care about her as just a friend. I know jealousy can be annoying, I’ve been through something like that as well. Trust plays a huge part, and just know that you do trust your man; it’s the girl you don’t trust and that’s a normal thing.

    January 30, 2014
  30. wishpeoplewere

    If it really bothers you, and it looks like it does, in the nicest way you can, tell him how you feel. Maybe make him some nachos and sit down and in a loving way say how you feel. If he loves you, and I’m sure he does, he will do all he can to love you the way you deserve to be loved.

    January 31, 2014
  31. flfitlady13

    You should meet her and talk to her face to face like grown women do…

    February 06, 2014
  32. ella_bells

    when a relationship ends all ties should be cut with that person…. how is he fully going to move on if he still talks to his ex or her parents! it makes no sense! i know he probably created a bond with her parents but once he got into a relationship with you it should have ended so he could form a new bond with your family and keep your relationship going from strength to strength…you need to ask him how would he feel if the tables were turned?? would he appreciate you going to your ex boyfriend house

    February 10, 2014
  33. urfab

    Have you asked him how he would feel if the roles were reversed? what if 1 of those 2 best guy friends of yours had a past intimate relationship with you?? What if you went shopping with your exes mom? Hung out with your exes dad and/or family? Guaranteed he would not like that. He needs to be clear that this has nothing to with jealousy but rather repsect. Maybe you could sit them both down & explain to them you trust him, but not her. You can not trust someone you do not know. If her intentions were pure she should have reached out to you from the beginning to ensure you it is just a friendhsip. It has everything to do with RESPECT. Hold your ground girl! You’re worth it

    February 12, 2014
  34. rachelfrazee

    Hum yeah, you should definitely meet her. What might be said, forgotten. If you mean that much to each other you should be able to be open with each other about anything. Let him know that you are uncomfortable with this even though you trust him. It’s HER you’re not sure about. You’d like to meet her and get to know her a little. Maybe you could tag along the next time he goes over. Who the heck knows, you may end up liking her and all be friends… Well it could happen Anyway, he should understand and agree to it, especially if he has nothing to hide.

    March 27, 2014
  35. rachelfrazee

    Also, I agree with ella_bells. If you don’t like the idea of meeting her, and I know personally I wouldn’t, then don’t. Let him know it makes you uncomfortable and ask him how he would feel if the table were turned. Ties should have been cut, memories could bring back old feelings and people are stupid to be so smart, if you know what I mean.

    March 27, 2014
  36. sandracek

    If your boyfriend still talks to her then it is crucial for you to meet her, but might I warn you DO NOT and I mean DO NOT flaunt that he is yours because that will only drive her to him even if there isn’t anything going on. I’m glad you trust your boyfriend and you need to trust yourself, be open with him. You have two choices arrange a coffee date for the three of you (make sure you figure out basic conversation topics and dont bring up the past), and see for yourself


    Be open with him and just say I trust you but not her, I love you and I trust our relationship so if something changes or she tries something please be open with me and we can talk this through.

    Hope that helps, speaking from experience!

    March 29, 2014
  37. pll2010

    Since your relationship is built on trust, then you should have an honest conversation about it. This allows you to get all your questions out without sounding nervous about their relationship as friends. To show you have nothing to hide or trust him, meeting her is something you should do.

    March 30, 2014
  38. victorianojang

    well in my opinion communication is the key in other to put an end to your fears and insecurities

    March 30, 2014
  39. victorianojang

    You need to set things straight know where your relationship is headed and if he is worth the trust you are giving him that is very important, open up to him and let him know of your fears regarding the other woman, good luck and all the best!

    March 30, 2014
  40. maccalito

    You need to start reading my blog.

    March 30, 2014
  41. dominique99

    Maybe they thought they would be better as friends than a couple so the’re trying to be friends? But by all means, I think you should meet her. And I also think you should talk to him about how you feel. Maybe it will make you feel better?

    April 03, 2014
  42. yeraniaecheverria

    Your right shes an ex for a reason. If he broke up with her then its over n no point to be friends with her. He should respect u as his girlfriend and give u ur place to this relationship. Talking to his ex is so not respectful for u and not healthy for the relationship. You should stand up for urself and talk to him but seating calm and say: im ur girlfirnd i love u so much but its not respectful to me and uncomfortable to me that ur still are talking to your ex. You are with me and i dont want you talking to your ex. Your ex is your ex n its over. Now you are with me and you shoyld give me my place to this relationship and if you think this cant work out let me know and ill make a decision.
    You also need to have dignity and if this guy still wants to talk to his ex than breakup with him and hey u dont need to be struggling in a relationship when u can be in a healthy relationship and deal with othr things. Being friends with an ex it means trouble. Just speak say what u want and need to say

    April 08, 2014
  43. stephiexbabe

    Having an ex in the picture will make your relationship harder and more complicated to maintain a healthy relationship. The one thing you should think about is… the things you can and can’t control. In this scenario its the things you are willing to tolerate or not tolerate in this relationship and define what is crossing the line and what isn’t. Unfortunately, you have no control over his ex’s intentions, how she feels and her thoughts. If you truly trust your boyfriend and if he is loyal you have nothing to worry about. If he is faithful you don’t have to view her as a threat but I couldn’t understand the frustration that can build up to see your boyfriend still have his ex (his past and his history) in the present with you. You just have to think about you and be aware of your feelings.

    April 16, 2014
  44. bloodwulf

    First, I’m not sure he’s really commited to you. Second, ask him to find somewhere else to hunt. If he truly wants YOU, he will be willing to make an effort to dodge this girl IF NEEDED. As far as her parents, that maybe where a compromise gets difficult.

    April 19, 2014
  45. kkjane2010

    Have you spoken to your boyfriend about how you feel? What does he think about your concerns?

    April 21, 2014
  46. youhitlikeabitch

    Meet her. If not, at least FB her or talk on the phone to her. You never know, she might have some funny stories to tell about him

    April 24, 2014
  47. a-t-for-teenagers

    umm mabey she dosent egzist maybe hes saying that so you would get jealous , or to see what you would do or say if she is real and you meet her well then see if shes a bitch or a nice girl who respects that hes with you , if you dont meet her or at least see her on facebook becouse if you dont even speak then how do you now that shes real? good luck

    April 25, 2014
  48. a-t-for-teenagers

    omg guys have you guys not notest this was posted on august 12 -——> 2012 <—————-

    April 25, 2014
  49. mkclaridge

    what happened? you guys best friends now?

    May 07, 2014
  50. seekingperfect

    One mans point of view for what it’s worth, take, leave say piss off: I think it can end BADLY between you two!.xsorry if that’s not what you want to hear.

    June 15, 2014
  51. always-here-4-u

    I can see where you are coming from. I’ve never been in a relationship…ever, but I have friends who are, and have been, and I’ve read plenty of books based upon these issues. I think that you are feeling a bit of anxiety in this situation, as I comprehend. You are afraid that your boyfriend’s ex will make a move on him again, and I get that. But look at this, they both broke up for a reason: she cheated on him, and obviously he is in love with you, and if you two have managed to stay together for about a year and a half, I think that he’s a pretty trust-worthy boyfriend. I think that if she did try to make a move on him, I believe that he as a good boyfriend, would come to you and talk about it. If you are seriously concerned, then I suggest you pull your boyfriend over to the side, and say that you want to tell him something. Don’t do it when you guys are hanging out with your friends or something, because he will think that something is wrong, or that you are going to break up with him. Do it when you guys are hanging out, just the two of you. And you can start by saying that there is an issue that you are concerned about, and have been for a while. You can say, that you are a bit uncomfortable with how you are constantly around his ex’s house, and though you understand why he’s there, you are worried that his ex might make a move on him. Just say that you trust him, and if anything were to happen, you trust him enough to tell you up front. And basically, time can only tell. But if you wnat some other tips, you can always message me, or email me @

    June 20, 2014
  52. soulfulfemme

    Never worry about an ex, worry about your man ONLY because all the cards are in his hands. She can’t do anything unless he lets her.

    June 24, 2014
  53. philholmes

    I know how you feel. My girlfriend used to hang out with her ex alot. Even though they broke up, they stayed good friends. Sure there were still feelings there but she loved me and stayed true to me. I always trusted her but I never really trusted him although I met him on a few occasions and found him to be okay. Then, there was one day when he broke that unspoken trust of being allowed to be alone with her. He had surprised her with trying to make a move and that was the beginning of the end of their friendship. She was scared I would hate her for it but I blamed him more than her. I still love her and am still with her. Our love grows stronger everyday. They don’t talk anymore or hangout anymore since he parted with the group of friends.

    As long as he knows how you feel and you’ve explained that you trust him but not her, then you should be fine.

    If you need anything, or just wanna talk randomly my inbox is always open.

    June 29, 2014
  54. godlovingsinner

    Sometimes the world isn’t so black and white. learned it the hard way. i have an ex girlfriend that i was talking to at certain points during my relationship with another woman. It meant nothing to me. I was there when she broke up with her girl, and everything that she said just reminded me that she never changed… so she became a bigger turn off. Now… Im pretty sure some of us have heard those stories where two people were madly in love and the time was not right and maybe one or the both of them were not right either. That in NO way means that they can never get back together again. Remember, folks… people change.

    July 05, 2014
  55. blueskycloud

    I guess tgis will prove how strong your relationship is. It will put out how much y’all van really trust each other.. how well y’all can talk about things that bother rach other… I think yoi should just talk to him see what’s going on… tell him…. and maybe you will understand why he still talks to her.. good luck hopes this helps

    July 08, 2014
  56. pmack917

    Me and my ex-boyfriend dated for three years. We broke up four years ago and are still best friends to this day. Our friendship was what was most important because of how long we were together and how much we had been through together. He has a new girlfriend. My ex-boyfriend has introduced me to her, and her an I have hung out by ourselves a few times. Your boyfriend should definitely introduce you to her, so you can get to know her and see what her intentions are and also how they interact together.

    July 18, 2014
  57. kitsuneeyes

    I know how things might look, but if your boyfriend gets to meet the guys you converse with, you should get to know who she is. Sometimes, its really nothing. In some cases, like mine, things just didn’t work out when he and I were a couple, but we remained as friends because we started that way in the beginning, and after breaking up, that is all we were really good for with each other. Friends. Go and meet her with an open mind, no judgements or nothing. Forget that she was even his ex and think of her as a friend. Usually when a person is comfortable with someone they will eventually talk. You can tell when something is up, but don’t be clouded with bad thoughts till you meet them face to face. Again, open mind and with an unclouded heart. If he loves you, he will express it in front of her all the way and she wouldn’t express no negative feelings to it.

    July 31, 2014
  58. ecargsnevaeh

    An ex is just an, an ex is the past. The past needs to stay where it belongs a b d thats in the past. We are different people so you might not feel the same as me. But i wouldn’t want my man being friends with anyone he was physical or emotionally with. Trust has some to do with it but really what sticks out to me is that he needs to respect your guys relationship and understand how you feel and tell him to find new haunting grounds, her land isn’t the only property with animals on it. Best of luck deary

    August 03, 2014
  59. ecargsnevaeh

    Ahh errors… ex isvjust an ex….. and thats…. hunting not hauting… sorry just woke up and didnt catch my errors first time around, my bad :-)

    August 03, 2014
  60. lostinthesolarsystem

    It’s weird that if he does see her and goes over there so much that you haven’t met her. You would think that he would introduce you just to put your mind at ease.

    August 05, 2014
  61. cruelfate

    Wow, I can only imagine the strain would cause on a relationship. I am a jealous person and would not handle that situation very well. Keep you head up, you are a bigger person that I…

    August 21, 2014
  62. hope4

    maybe they have been doing stuff behind your back but you just don’t know about it. I think they should stop talking. if he’s close with her parents then he can just talk to her parents.

    August 23, 2014
  63. scarlet_pimpernel

    It is true that they are “an ex for a reason”, yet they were also once connected in a positive way and you can’t always erase that.

    Be confident in yourself and your relationship – just the same, he is with you for a reason so keep that reason a positive one.

    Don’t let jealousy taint your confidence.

    August 27, 2014
  64. twistedlife

    If you’ve earned each others trust, by all means let him do his thing (: if you feel iffy about the girl && feel like you need to meet the person then tell him. Trust goes upon all ways. Whether its your past or your future. If you have the trust don’t be afraid to speak your mind
    &&head high, heart strong

    September 01, 2014
  65. jaas

    Hi i think soo u should meet that girl becoz u never know past can sometimes effect d present and future . so its better u meet her and she should know that ur bf is committed to u

    September 05, 2014
  66. aleenabellavitagiorgio

    Your far from alone out there, I myself don’t like if my boyfriend/spouse keeps in touch with ex-girlfriends (makes me very uncomfortable) chin up darling

    September 09, 2014
  67. eviningstar

    I understand where you are coming from, Its not the best feeling in the world, I think you should do what you have to as your the one that has to go through this and not him. If it bothers you so much you and him should talk about this.

    October 06, 2014
  68. dreambig21

    You’ve been with him for A year and a half. There’s no reason he should still talk to her or her family. There’s something he’s not telling you. Address it with him before you build up lots of anger and allow it to explode.

    October 22, 2014
  69. MulanSouth

    I think that he shouldn’t keep any contact with her or her family for the simple fact she’s an ex which means there’s history there. Just ask him how he would feel If it was you who still communicated with an ex and his family when in a new relationship!

    October 24, 2014
  70. laneymarietta

    I agree with marjania. You should just talk to him about how you feel. He probably has no idea, and even though its hard to be open, its important for the success of your relationship.

    November 26, 2014
  71. aysiaalizemarrero

    Well i have been in a situation where my man talks to his ex, there may be some things he still has to communicate with her about. Not saying your man has a kid, but mine did and he had to see his baby mamam and keep regular contact so she would let him see his son. It can be as big as that or as small as a pet, or something like that. Don’t worry so much. If you trust him, you’d see that he cares for you. As you said, she is an ex for a reason. You don’t have to care about someone or love them to talk to them. Hope that was a little helpful, and maybe you should give an update on your situation.

    December 23, 2014
  72. whytrywithboys

    Honestly it doesn’t matter what the ex did, once someone is in love you would be surprised on the things they would forgive each other for just to be in each others lives. I recently have been in a relationship where I thought my guy and his ex were done because she cheated. However, once they got back in contact with each other I knew I had to be worried because they had longer history then me and the guy. So my advice to you is to ask your guy to stop talking to her because no matter how many times he tells you they are just friends you are never going to stop worrying about it. Don’t keep your thoughts in, say how you feel because you need to protect yourself and stay in control of your happiness. I hope everything works out in the end but just remember your his new girl so if you ask him to stop talking to her he should have no problem doing so. if he doesn’t want to stop talking to her then that’s a sign that he didn’t fully get over her and no matter what he will always want her to be apart of his life and that’s something you shouldn’t be dragged into.

    January 05, 2015
  73. odyssey3

    You are not comfortable with the situation, and quite rightly so. You can sit at home and try and convince yourself that all is well but it isnt is it? Drop him and spend your energy with someone who is going to
    give you their full attention.

    February 22, 2015
  74. kittiecatour

    i agree with odyssey3 but also he is probably cheating or has been this whole time and if you are just talking as friends to your ex and not getting back together then he has trust issues and needs to be dropped like a fly

    February 26, 2015
  75. hannahwallace2009

    The biggest thing is yes she is an ex for a reason. I just got out of a long relationship where I completely gave my heart to him. He acted like he did not like his ex would never go back and really frankly talked immortal crap about her. Well not even a week later who was he seen with the ex. Always remember TRUST but VERIFY!! Do it for your own heart. Mine is broke and there is no fixing it.

    March 06, 2015
  76. lindsey52688

    I have been there. I don’t think it is good for an ex to be a part of someone’s life unless there is a child involved. I don’t think their should be a grudge against the girl, but I also don’t see the point of her being involved in your boyfriends life. When you two have problems, there is a good chance he will turn to her. This is where problems can come up. I’d tell him your honest feelings, if he isn’t guilty of doing anything he will stay calm, and reassure you. However, if he gets defensive or mad it’s a good sign he has something to hide.

    March 09, 2015
  77. truthinsidethefiction

    Talk to your boyfriend about it. Tell him how you feel, without making him feel uncomfortable or defensive. If he’s worth pursuing he’ll understand.

    March 26, 2015
  78. sadmom22

    I have the same problem. My boyfriend doesn’t talk to her parents or anything but he still texts and snapchats her from time to time and when I asked him why and that she was supposed to stay in the past cause she’s an ex he just tells me that they didn’t end things badly and he doesn’t hate her so he thinks they can still be friends. She hates me too which makes it worse. And I know he was in love with her. It scares me but really there’s nothing I can do about it. At least it sounds like you’re pretty confident that your boyfriend would put her in her place if she did try. Idk what mine would do..:/

    April 17, 2015
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  80. theblogger

    I would confront her. But be more mature than she would be. Let her know how you honestly feel. But do it diligently. If worst comes to worst, I think you should just move on and leave the senseless drama to his ex.

    April 24, 2015
  81. sammiekucera144

    I was in the same boat as you are. My whatever he is to me now, used to talk to his ex all the time and he would bash on me. I was pregnant with his child and he did not have any of my trust because he talked to her all the time and kept it a secret from me. I know how you feel and sometimes meeting the person will help ease your nerves and help you realize that she is not as bad as she is in your head. I never met his ex but I know much about her because he would constantly talk about her and it pissed me off. Just talk to him about it or just let it go and hope that he would tell you if something were to happen.

    April 29, 2015
  82. mommy2brooklyn

    You definitely have to meet her. That’s good you trust your boyfriend, but meet her and it will probably ease your mind.

    May 07, 2015
  83. babyc14

    I say do what you feel is best go meat her or don’t but be careful if she tries anything show her that its her fault she lost him and that she needs to let him go and I can understand if your confused about something cuz I would be to I mean you can hear and believe what one person is telling you but you don’t know what goes on behind closed doors

    May 07, 2015
  84. kalliannebutcher

    I understand how you feel. After my husband broke up with his ex girlfriend they still talked from time to time. More like she would contact him. And over stupid shit too. I thought it was weird because she was the one who cheated and ended the relationship. After she moved back down to Wyoming he was giving her money monthly and still supporting her some. Which I think shows how great of a guy he really is. And what a sleaze she is. It’s sad when the one who ended it won’t let it go. I understand, I wouldn’t want to meet her either because words would also be exchanged if I was you. I have met my husband’s ex girlfriend. She was a friend of a friend which is how we met in the first place. We at least were completely over our last relationships before dating each other. Actually, when I met him again I didn’t even realize that he was the same guy that I had met a few months prior. His ex tried to ruin his life. Telling everyone he beat her up and all of this. So I wanted nothing to do with him. I’m glad that I found out that it was all lies and that I gave him a second chance. It was the best thing I’ve ever done. Ex’s are ex’s for a reason. Some people belong in the past and need to stay there. I hope that you can get this all worked out. And come to accept it. I know that’s not an easy thing to do, believe me, I’m kinda calling the kettle black even. But yeah. I hope that you are doing better. Just try and take the high road if you do ever meet. And remember she’s an ex for a reason and in his past (more or less) for a reason!!

    May 07, 2015
  85. complicated_girl

    I dealt with something like this before. While me and my ex were together, he talked to his ex and they hadn’t been broken up for long. I know it’s a total invasion of privacy, but i looked at their text messages and she was talking about how she loved him and they he should break up with me for her and all that crap. I confronted him about it and he tried many attempts to get her to leave him alone, but she never did. I guess all I can say is to tell him how u feel, because if she really wants to do something with him she won’t leave him alone.

    May 17, 2015
  86. trepidsoul

    The first thing that came to my mind after reading the first sentence is that “HE’S MAKING YOU A REBOUND.” It was a sudden thought but then after reading that it has been a year and a half, it’s completely messed up. Try asking your boyfriend about her, ask why you haven’t been introduced to her. I mean if they ended and became just friends your guy must thought of letting the two of you know each other for purposes of setting the lines where you two belong. Just saying but you should talk this over with your guy.

    May 19, 2015
  87. justme2013

    there is a lot of good advise in the previous posts, so I am not going to repost their thoughts. The only thing I have to add is…..he picked you..right? So obviously he has good taste! There must have been something about this girl for him to think she was worth taking a chance on. So, maybe instead of being worried, be thankful that, he thought you were a better person than her(cause he is with you now!) And instead of thinking about him yearning for her, think about her…..seeing him, visit with her parents, how they still adore him, kicking herself for messing it up and yearning for him…all the while, reminding yourself…..he is coming home to YOU!

    May 28, 2015
  88. darrelo77

    Do you know what you would do if something happened between them? If you already do, then you can ease your mind about her and him. Deal with it if it happens. Worry serves no purpose most of the time. If you trust your boyfriend, then there is no reason to worry. If you don’t trust him, then hopefully you know what you would want to do.

    June 29, 2015
  89. musical_cherrie

    Look, it is natural for you to feel this way. But communication is KEY, for a relationship to work and be healthy. I believe that honesty is always the best policy. I know you are worried he might think you are being “jealous”, but you are rightfully concerned about the relationship. SO have a sit down conversation with him, some people need to just be told, they are never going to read your mind. He probably doesn’t think it’s an issue, and he doesn’t even realize that your feelings are being hurt (because you have two guy friends). Try sitting down with him and explaining that you are worried that there still might be some unresolved feelings. If there is, then it’s his choice to keep the EX in his life.However, you have stated how it makes you feel, and that if “something” were to happen, it won’t be her fault: but his. Do not give him an ultimatum, because that only breeds animosity. All you can do is tell him the truth, if he handles it well, I’m sure you have nothing to worry about. You will be surprised what he shares with you once he realizes you guys can sit down and have an open conversation with out a fight happening. Best luck to you girl!

    July 17, 2015
  90. sarahisobelbloomfield

    Wow so many responses!
    From my experiences i agree with the above musical_cherrie in saying communication is KEY because in any relationship it really is. Tell your boyfriend your concerns you have been together for long enough to be able to confide in him with this type of stuff even when it is hard to say. Only meet they girl if you are comfortable, sometimes meeting someone like that can only make things worse.. All the best for you and your boyfriend.

    July 20, 2015
  91. lgully

    I am in the same boat as you right now, minus the he goes hunting at her house part. Communication is key in a relationship, along with trust and I’m glad you trust that he would deny her, like you say she is in the past for a reason, why they still cherish a relationship with someone that screwed them over is beyond me. Tell him what’s on your mind, voice your concern because there’s a fine line with an ex you just don’t cross when you’re in a relationship with someone else. He should take you to meet her, that way you get to kind of get a feel of what she’s like and if she is a very untrustworthy person around him.

    July 22, 2015
  92. minds1

    U should figure it out…talk to ur better half. discussion solves many doubts

    July 23, 2015
  93. mariamariah27

    follow your instincts.. you will feel it when something is odd. but always have a calm disposition. never be afraid to confront your bf and ask and tell him how you feel about it…make sure your approach would not make him feel awkward. best of luck

    July 30, 2015
  94. nemoian

    I also believe if being friends still is possible, why not. Like someone else said u were with them fr a reaason. When I ssay I love u to someone I mean I will always. Not I love u as long as u stay with me or a long shpping list of things. Tho that is how it basically iss with ppl. Maybe she’s not the cheater… maybe you should meet her to find out what happened. Something might be fishy with the whole she cheated on me, yet I can still stand to talk to her and the ppl who raised her. If something is up u want to find out somehow.
    Who knows yoou could become friends like some other ppl talked about. I really don’t get peoples idea of if its over it over. Maybe when some shit hits the fan. But if u have just decided this isn’t going to work. Why wouldn’t u be friends with someone u considered making a life with. Ask him. Ask him to meet them too. If he has problems with it that could be another sign.
    Goodluck dear. Follow your intuition.

    August 07, 2015
  95. natashavalerie

    its a touggh one you have to just go with you gut and hope nothing does happen voice how you feel to your boyfriend, he may try and sympathise with how you feel.. you know like put the shoe on the other foot situation, but girl just remember innocent till proven guilty meet this girl she might be a gnerally cool girl who just made a bad choice, we all make bad choices and fuck up once in a while doesnt make us all monsters does it ? hopw this helped

    August 16, 2015
  96. schoolgirlproblems

    I’ve been In a situation like this before, honestly I think what you should do is ask yourself why do you care? you say you’ve been with this boy for more than a year? if anything was going to happen again between your boyfriend and her ex, it would have by now. there is no reason for you to feel like this because you’ve won! your boyfriend has proven that he doesn’t want her, otherwise he would be with her and not you. if you don’t meet this girl, I wouldn’t want to go saying things about her when you haven’t met her. she may have cheated on your boyfriend in the past, but maybe she had a very good reason? she could be a very nice girl and you just cannot see past mistakes she’s made when nobody is perfect, I know im not but people who don’t know me don’t judge me on one mistake. I hope this helps x

    August 18, 2015
  97. gardengirl

    I feel like exes should stay exes and that’s it. I don’t talk to any of my exes personally. The ex right before my husband send me a FB shout out on my birthday though, but we don’t talk. My husband knows who he is and knows that he doesn’t mean any disrespect. My husband has a female friend that he grew up with and I know her. She comes to all family functions and has never tried anything out of the way with him. If he insists on still being friends with her you should make your presence known. Not in a confrontational way at all, but she needs to know that you exist and aren’t going anywhere.

    August 21, 2015
    1. karinaalulu


      September 07, 2015
  98. wolfwalker4570

    Exs are exs for a reason, but i have been in your shoes also personally. I have been with a guy who i have never met their ex and they still talk, we were together for 4 years and when i found out that he has really been talking to her he cheated on me with her. What im trying to say is maybe its a good thing you have never met her, because think about this, would you be in the same place as you are now if you did meet her? and if he does go over there and only talks to her parents maybe thats a good thing also, because then he isnt talking to her so you wont have a whole lot to worry bout especially if he will deny her if she does try anything ya know?

    September 01, 2015
  99. samy_shiny

    am really sorry, but as a man, you can’t judge ur partner in this case. it is my challenge. if he is truly loves you why he keep her as well in contact. ans spl. visiting… your machine is different you can’t imagine what man can do. and their behavior or nature how is it. i can’t say more but if u want contact me personally..i will give u some proofs.

    September 05, 2015
  100. beautifulfool

    I wouldn’t be ok with that, at all; and neither should he. I’m sure she wouldn’t be ok if the roles were reversed. Especially since she cheated on him, which signals insecurity and instability within her. Sorry you’re in that situation. Go hunting with them and … Well, you know.

    September 07, 2015
  101. karinaalulu

    Have you talked to your boyfriend about this? I’ve been through something similar and the best thing I can tell you is COMMUNICATION IS KEY. Let him know how you feel, tell him you don’t like the fact that he still goes around her house. You’re 100% right, she is an ex for a reason. That is a closed chapter, he has no business being over there or even talking to her family. Its going to send her mixed signals too. Once you have spoken to him see what he says, if he stops than he values your feelings. I am sure there are other places to go hunting at.
    Karina Lulu

    September 07, 2015
  102. mumof2babies

    I agree i would never agree to talking to an ex, as you said and ex is and ex for a reason!.

    September 26, 2015
  103. cherpiecherp

    you might ask what happend more in depth; if shes living with her parents & single… she might have been used up by another man or men who didnt care that SHE was dating your ex (@the time)… there just might be more to understand of the situation.

    October 01, 2015
  104. enadiz6

    Personally I somehow think that in able for you to be relieve of the fact that they are still talking or seeing each other, whether with or without reason, then I suggest you must talk to your boyfriend perhaps and explain to him how you feel about him having this constant communication with his ex. Tell him if it makes you feel uncomfortable, weird or whatsoever just so he knows your thought and how you feel with it. I bet he’ll be happy to hear it from you since you’re in a relationship where trust is not supposed to be an issue. Anyways, sorry for my late comment, I am a newbie so I’m currently in the state of exploring lol.

    October 05, 2015
  105. oryory

    Hello !
    I’m CATHERINE . I’m going to make you a quite poignant testimony. I had divorced with my husband there is this 1 month, despite the very high degree of my love for him. I talked about this with a neighbor, and she promised to help me. Then she gave me the email of a marabout and advised me to contact him and explain my case. When I contacted the marabout, I explained the entire situation prevailing between my husband and me. He indeed promised me to do something to bring my husband back to me. Therefore, he showed me a few rituals. Curiously, in the next seven days, my husband returned and me begs me reconcile with him, it was a real miracle for me. In addition to this, I had some trouble at work with my Director. But all these problems have been resolved and since I live in peace as well in my service in my home. It is the first miracle that I have experienced in my life.
    So, for all your small problems including breakup or divorce, disease, luck, as well as issues related to your person one way or another, i.e. belly aches, birthing problems, blocking problems, attraction of customer problems looking for employment or other, I urge you refer in this marabou. It is really competent. With him, I had the satisfaction to my problems in three days. It is very effective especially in the resolution of problems relating to the emotional return.
    Here is his e-mail:
    Good luck to you!

    October 26, 2015
  106. thinkingoutloud90

    I guess the main thing you have to remember is that they are an ex for a reason and you just have to trust that your partner is not going to do anything …trust is the key to a relationship and if he breaks that trust thats when more serious conversations need to occur. My partner speaks to one of his exes on and off & I just need to remember who he is with now and why they broke up to begin with.

    November 10, 2015
  107. arabica

    If you have trust issues, it’ll never work out. Love, cannot be built upon an empire of lies and deceit as a foundation. Eventually, any lies and deceit will consume each of you.

    November 10, 2015
  108. hhobbs2000

    I can see why you would be suspicious, but i think that if you truly love your boyfriend and he feels then there is nothing to worry about, just don’t let your curiosity get in the way. He may take it that you don’t believe him and that could cause some problems. The best thing to do is to tell him how you feel about it and listen to his side too.

    November 13, 2015
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  110. someoneyouknow

    after reading few comments i wanted to say that in my life all my ex’s are not my friends but from time to time we talk because they used to be part of my life and that is why we keep in touch. most of them have other girls and some of them are engaged but we just like to check on each other. btw after you both being together for such long time ( as my present relationship) i think he loves you and got no time for a game. he left that girl and he started new life with you that mean he is already over her and for sure he probably just use her parents.

    November 22, 2015
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  112. sammiejammie

    To me personally, if there are no kids involved, staying friends with ex’s is not ok. I bit my tongue for years with my at the time boyfriend about him and his ex keeping in contact and found myself blowing up about certain things that had nothing to do with what i was blowing up about but because of everything i was holding inside. Unfortunately for me, I was being cheated on so my opinion my be tainted. I think It will only cause problems, but if you honestly trust him and that there is nothing going on, you should meet the ex. Maybe it will put any feelings you have about the situation to rest. I think you need to be open and honest with your boyfriend and just express how it makes you feel. I did this with my current boyfriend and he put a ca-bosh to talking with his ex’s, I didn’t tell him he had to, I just let him know how it made me feel. Good luck hun, I think honesty is your best bet!

    December 07, 2015
  113. ladywag

    Agree must be a difficult situation but you just need to be honest about how it makes you feel when he talks to her.

    December 17, 2015
  114. superficial1

    If you’d like my pennies worth, it’s never acceptable to keep in contact with an ex partner unless there are children involved and even then it would be strictly about the children only.

    December 23, 2015
  115. unnamedsource

    If you can, If ANYONE CAN. At least read my blog.

    December 30, 2015
  116. pedritoramos

    This is all very simple. If you have an issue with your BF having a Bestie that is a female, or an issue with ANYTHING, then as your boyfriend, he should make that choise of getting rid of whatever is causing you uneasiness. Make any sense? When I met my wife and we began to date “seriously”, I made a councious effor to get rid of people that may have possibly caused issues between us. Hope this helps.

    January 16, 2016
  117. shayani

    i would suggest you to first confront your BF, his ex does not matter to you. Who matters is your BF, you guys are together since 1.5 years and still you are refraining to take any steps. You should first have a proper discussion with your BF and then you should identify where all this is leading to. If required take the ex’s number and call her.
    It better now than never.

    January 16, 2016
  118. cutdacrap

    People argue with me constantly – insisting guys and girls CAN be just friends. Fact is, it is RARE. Both people have to be very mature, and very trusting. Neither can have feelings for the other, or have had feelings for each other, for it to work. You should not be trusting of the situation you described. You do not know this girl, and you should. She is in YOUR life as well as in his, and you have a right to know her personally, especially because she is an ex. Why haven’t you met her anyway – that bothers me. If there’s nothing to hide, then it all should be upfront and open. Trust is great, but in this case I think you’re setting yourself up to get very hurt. Insist all three of you be friends – that’s the only way to know what you’re dealing with.

    January 25, 2016
  119. lovellyme

    Unfortunately now you will either choose to be uncomfortable about the situation and say nothing, or you’ll speak to your boyfriend and let him know you dont like him keeping contact with her. If youre as close as you say you are you should be more then comfortable to make him aware of how youre feeling

    January 30, 2016
  120. charmainesworld

    You need to come to an agreement with him and let him know what you don’t feel comfortable with and tell him he can also tell you about how he really feels about your friends who are guys.

    February 04, 2016
  121. shanajadechurch

    My boyfriends ex is always mad at me, she says that I took what was, “Hers” but in all honestly I think that she is jealous, I mean it is either jealousy or her just being one of those exs who can’t get over him. If you trust him then tell him how you feel about it..

    February 06, 2016
  122. ettingergirl516

    my boyfriend dated only 4 other girls then me. the first one was way back like 5th or 6th grade and ever since havnt seen eachother or anything. second one was 6th grade and she cheated on him. we had issues with her because she was like a stalker she would always ask my boyfriends family how he was, if we were still together. When she found out we were having a kid she went so far to message me and tell me that he dont love me, that she will get him back because she is all he wants and all this blah blah. then she decided to ask my boyfriends dad if she could come visit for a week and stay in his bed, little did she know i lived with them but it was a no lol. we put an end to her lol. then the last 2 were both between 7th and 8th grade. he only dated them because everyone took what he was saying wrong and because everyone told him he had to be dating someone. the last one he left for me and to this day if i see her i will talk with her because the time they were together she knew he wanted me and loved me. he does not talk with her because he feels as if someone is your ex you should end all comunications especially if you are in a dif relationship. i was friends with some exs but he explained to me how he felt so i understood. point is talk to him lol

    February 15, 2016
  123. lydiaperri

    if you trust your boyfriend and trust the decidions he makes then you should know that he will not leave you for another girl she cheated on him so I doubt she is the loyal type and if it bothers you that much you shuld tell him how you feel and ask him if you can meet her and if he is as caing and understanding as you say then he should have no problem with it life is too short to live someone elses ife live your life take chances and do what ;you want because life is short and you ny get one time to live it

    February 16, 2016
  124. existentialequipment

    So, what do you think after reading everyone’s responses? What are you going to do or if you did something, what happened/what do you think about it?

    February 28, 2016
  125. americanhoney2k16

    I recently found out as well my bf of two months still talks to his ex gf…he said it’s rare they talk and they live in two diff cities in the same state…i know i shouldn’t worry about it but the fact that it’s his ex…bothers me and i told him…since then he says he hasn’t spoken to her.

    May 26, 2016
  126. leigh123

    I had an ex I stayed friends with because we just happened to grow up and apart from one another. We both however agreed that if either of us got into relationships where our new partner did not like us still talking we would end it. It’s a respect thing. Your boyfriend should respect you and if he felt uncomfortable with you spending time with your guy friends alone, then you have to respect his wishes. That’s part of a relationship. Listening and respecting what the other one may feelt.

    June 19, 2016
  127. curiouselena

    I would talk to your boyfriend about your concerns, and get it out in the open. you don’t want this hanging around your relationship. you want to move forward. you want to meet her and you should meet her with an open frame of mind. there must be something that your boyfriend feels like he needs to speak to her. Maybe he enjoys her friendship and the familiarity of her. If he has nothing to hide then this shouldn’t be an issue. you deserve to be happy and know about his friends and the people he speaks to. I believe that you really get to know the personality of someone your in relationship with through what there friends are like. I think it reflects a true aspect of what they are like and what kind of people they like having in their life. Face this head on and youll soon find clarity.

    July 05, 2016
  128. lilcas

    Seeing as you two have been dating for a year and a half, I would personally confront him about it. Just ask him why they still talk if she cheated on him. First find out his reasons and also, let him know how it makes you feel that he still talks to her. Trust is important in any relationship but so is communication. Sit and think how you feel and how you want to go about asking him (if you want to confront him) and then just go for it. If you don’t say anything, then it will bother you yet if you confront him then you might end up in an argument. It’s not an easy situation, I’m in something similar myself with my boyfriend. Remember, a relationship isn’t about just the one person, it’s about both of you. He should also respect how something makes you feel and compromise for that. I wouldn’t want to be doing something that I can change if it makes my boyfriend feel uncomfortable and I wouldn’t like him to do something that makes me feel that way too. If you two have a strong relationship, you should be able to sit down and talk about things like this and be able to sort them out. Follow your heart and what you believe to be the right thing to do, all we can do is give advice but it’s your choice whether or not to act upon it.

    July 16, 2016
  129. kiyoumins

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    August 06, 2016
  130. kiyoumins

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  131. macieann62

    you need to meet her!!!! Also from my past experiences ive never seen exes get along like that!!!! i think there might be something going on!!!! why would a guy want to go hangout with his ex and only talk to her while hes there!!!! you need to go meet her and she how she acts around u!!! it will tell u whether something is going on or not and always trust ur gut feeling

    August 12, 2016
  132. allyjohnson567

    ask with you can meet her if he says no then you seriously need to have a talk with him

    October 23, 2016
  133. lilithmicheal

    I know this is a tough situation and i’ve been where you are today. I have an ex who i was actually engaged to (he thought in college he could have a wife and mistress-who was my room mate at the time) well after I graduated I moved back home and we became ex’s I haven’t seen him since, except for once but mistake b/c he showed up in the town i lived in (was following/ stalking me). I still periodically talk to his mom but never him. Mainly b/c I don’t care whats going on in his life at all. The only reason i talk with his mom is b/c i was the daughter she never had and we got and still are close. We don’t talk about her son and i don’t talk about my husband (usually).

    My advice is meet her, meet her mom, meet her dad heck insist the next time he goes over go with him! by all means make it clear that your in the picture and that you don’t want her to try anything.

    Now on the other side of the “sward” sort of speaking. IF he is (not saying he will) going to stray he’s got his reasons and he will have to come to terms with what he does if he wants to stay with you. Now with that being said: IF he does that’s bad very bad! but it’s also your choice if you want to keep him or toss him loose no matter the amount of time he and u have been together.

    Coming from personal experiences (yes i’m married) and my husband currently has a girl he texts and emails and tells a lot to. Have they met in person- no clue, do i know he’s texting and e-mailing her—-yes. why do i stay, b/c i have other things in the picture that i have to worry about right now. If he’s going to stray let him, gives me more solid grounds. If he doesn’t then well- lets just say i know he has. I’m not stupid.

    November 17, 2016
  134. vickyble

    Not the easiest thing you can cope with. You might have doubts about your boyfriend, if you don’t, maybe it’s the time to. But if truly loves you, he won’t betray you and cheat on you.

    December 19, 2016
  135. bonesdaily87

    Me personally I would tell your BF how you feel about it first! To be honest it can be a lot of things but before we make false assumptions we need to get to the bottom line between you and him and the dilemma your in! The mind is powerful and can think a lot of crazy things that aren’t actually true! If the guy respects you and wants to move forward with you he will find another place to hunt! I’m sure his ex gf house isn’t the only place! Put a stop to it or put your feeling aside and deal with it! Problem solved!

    January 09, 2017
  136. reens

    That is really hard. Have you expressed your feelings to your boyfriend? Sometimes I wonder how healthy it is to keep the past around like that. Does he still talk with her parents for any special reason? Does he have issues with his own parents and see them as a sort of replacement? Whatever the reason, he should put the past to rest and continue striving for a healthy, happy relationship with you. If he can’t do that, or doesn’t want to, maybe he’s not for you.

    January 15, 2017
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  138. soserendipity

    This is why going around sleeping with guys, claiming them as bf/gf’s is ludicris. It’s exactly why getting married is a better choice because then you would both understand that having friends unmarried together is more stable, trustworthy and you’ll have more in common with them then if your trying your best to trust each other with a bf/gf’s friends being male/female. It’s a real red flag that your both very young, very untrusting, and not mature enough to handle a real relationship. If you could, you’d both know your both doing each other an disservice by having friends of the opposite sex whom are single or unmarried. This is why relationships in Jr. High, High School, moving in with the other before your married is the worst plan ever. Always. When your older, more mature and you look back on this you’ll see as he will, how childish this relationship you have together really is. A solid family empty of drama and strife is the only real solid foundation.Only MARRIAGE after a sex free dating period of AT LEAST three years will give ANY chance of that happening. Especially if your planning on kids in the future. A relationship like yours? your already having doubts, your already talking yourself into the farse that you trust him.. and..a year in a half?!?!?! really? THATS what you call a relationship where you built trust?! lol When your 30, look back. You’ll laugh at this feble attlempt to be together “forever” at this time in your life, with your mindset at this age. lol GL.

    March 24, 2017
  139. beyondyourthoughts

    Abstain from investing negative thoughts in your head. You are in a relationship with your guys, try to talk to him. Sort it out. Cause lady, one day all this will come back at you, even though you’re suppressing those (-) thoughts of you, they’re still going to burst out somehow. Just talk it out and trust them words.

    April 13, 2017
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  141. drummarico

    There are a few exes I have where the family absolutely adored me, and maintained contact with me to a point — however, I had nothing to do with the communication to my ex. Keeping in touch with her seems like a red flag; especially if you’re unsure about her motives in keeping in contact with him. Despite your feelings of trust in him to deny her advances… he should be more respectful to you being his girlfriend for the past 18 months, and eliminate the scenario from the equation. How hard is it, really, to get new hunting friends??

    The last thing I’ll say is if you’ve been with him for this long, and still aren’t comfortable enough to be open and honest with him about your feelings regarding his ex only shows a lack of trust on your part. At very least talk with him and make sure he understands how you feel about everything. If he disregards how you feel, and tries to throw your 2 guy best friends back in your face… he might have something to hide. Otherwise, he’ll step up and, either, cut ties or find some way to compromise the situation to put your mind and heart at ease.

    Best of luck.

    August 12, 2017
  142. karinaalulu

    This doesn’t mean she’s insecure. Exs are ex, they are in the past.

    September 07, 2015
    1. sexualdesire

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      December 11, 2015